The Birth of Zee

The Birth of Zee
By Daddy D

It is Wednesday August 3rd, and Vanessa, her Mom, and I are at a regular visit with our certified nurse midwife, Gail, in Silver City, New Mexico. “Vanessa, let me check your cervix, have you been feeling any contractions?” Gail asked. “Only mild menstrual-like cramps.“ Vanessa replied. “Vanessa, you are already 3 cm. Are you sure you’re not feeling any contractions? Your cervix is 80% effaced and I can feel your water bulging. I think you could have this baby tonight.” We all look at each other astounded. Gail told us to go to the hospital in a few hours and get Vanessa hooked up to monitor contractions. Long story short -- since Mule Creek, the place we are nesting, is an hour drive away, we ended up staying in “Silver” for two days waiting for active labor to start.

On Friday, after no progress, we drove back to Mule Creek frustrated but determined not to induce labor.

“Zane, I think it’s time,” said Vanessa at 1:35 AM. The time between the contractions was 2 minutes and each contraction lasted about a minute. I bolted out of bed and was eager to get on the road. Vanessa’s Mom had heard us and was up and ready to go. I had the car going and Vanessa and I got in while Ted (Vanessa’s step Dad) drove ahead to open the gate along the dirt road to let us out. Once on the paved highway, I drove like the wind trying to get the Pathfinder over 100 mph. My greatest fear was of hitting an elk or deer in the dark of night as Vanessa focused on her breathing. Vanessa’s Mom trailed us in another vehicle.

Happily, we arrived at the Gila Medical Center in record time. At this point my blood pressure began to normalize and my heart slowed.. Vanessa was hooked up to the monitor to check the baby and the nurse checked V’s cervix. “You’re at 5cm,” she said. Now I knew this was it. Vanessa wanted to walk a bit so we took a stroll and chatted. Vanessa would pause every now and then to deal with the contractions and then press onward.

We returned to the room and I curled up with Vanessa in her bed and her Mom reclined in a chair. We all fell asleep. At 4:30 AM the nurse came in to check Vanessa’s cervix. “You are now at 8cm,” she said to Vanessa wide-eyed. I couldn’t believe this. I had heard and read stories of women who were in so much pain at 5 cm that they were begging for an epidural and Vanessa hadn’t even let out a whimper. I also knew that this meant that we were beyond the point of an epidural even if we decided we wanted it. Vanessa seemed undaunted and the three of us dozed off again. An hour later Gail, the midwife, interrupted our respite and checked Vanessa’s cervix once again. “You’re 9 cm”. “Whoa!” I thought. “We are close”. Vanessa just nodded stoically.

Not long after that Gail said, “Well Vanessa, your water hasn’t broken yet so if you are ready I will break your water to speed up the process.” Vanessa took a deep breath as we looked at each other and nodded. She was focused and didn’t show any outward signs of stress or concern. She was just breathing and concentrating on the task at hand. After the water was broken, Vanessa once again wanted to walk. Gail looked at Vanessa with mild surprise. We walked around a bit more and periodically stopped during a contraction. Vanessa would wrap her arms around me as if we were slow dancing until the pain subsided. We then returned to the room for the big event.

At 9:30 AM Vanessa began pushing. She was very methodical and deliberate. There were several options for pushing positions. There was the traditional lie down and push position, which didn’t make sense to Vanessa. She tried it a few times but it wasn’t very satisfying. Then there was the use of the birthing bar, an inverted U-shaped steel bar, that was situated over the bed. Vanessa was able to put both her legs up in a splayed position on the bar. A sheet was then draped around the top of the bar and Vanessa used this to pull herself upward toward the bar while pushing. But the most effective method was the squatting position. In this position the bottom portion of the bed was lowered and Vanessa was able to squat while holding the top of the bar.

After 2 hours of pushing I couldn’t believe her strength. She had been squatting and pushing and her legs were trembling with exhaustion. Through all of this Vanessa never uttered a cry and the attending nurses and midwives were amazed. I could now see a portion of the baby’s head. Gail and I kept telling Vanessa that she was getting closer but I was surprised that Vanessa didn’t tell us both off. I likened it to someone telling you that the finish line to a marathon is close; you are exhausted and feel as if you can’t go on. No end is in sight -- but this is one marathon you can’t stop, walk, or quit. The only thing I could do at this point was to help pull her up to the bar, continue to encourage her, and wipe the sweat from her brow. Gail looked at me and said, “I would hire Vanessa for any job, she has an amazing attitude.”

All of the sudden, Gail started to focus on the baby’s heart rate monitor which made me extremely nervous. Something wasn’t quite right. The baby’s heart rate was dropping. I was concerned for both Vanessa and the baby. We wanted a natural birth and I feared a complication might mean a C-section or something else – something bad. I stared at Gail and she asked the nurse that an oxygen mask be placed on Vanessa. Gail could tell I was nervous and she told me she wanted to get more oxygen to the baby. I became even more nervous when both nurses continued to stare at Gail and the monitor as the heart rate remained low. Because of her calm and confident presence and also due to the fact that Gail has been a midwife for 26 years, I felt she had it under control. Suddenly the pulse became stronger and I was able to breathe once again. Vanessa continued to reach out for my hand signaling me to pull her up to the squat bar as the contractions started again. My eyes remained fixed on the heart rate monitor.

Gail could tell Vanessa was worn out and I was amazed she was able to keep squatting as long as she had. “Vanessa,” said Gail, “I see no reason to do anything different as long as you can keep going, but there is an option of using a vacuum to help the process.” This is something Vanessa and I had read and talked about. It was not something that we wanted to do. Vanessa just shook her head, reached out for my hands, and continued to push.

And push she did!! I watched the baby’s head crown. I watched as my beautiful wife, with hardly any energy left at all, gave everything she had to have our baby as naturally as possible. The baby’s head finally popped out and I had my gloves ready to cut the cord when I suddenly realized why the baby’s heart rate had declined earlier. The cord was rapped snuggly around his little neck. Gail said we needed to cut the cord quickly and signaled Vanessa not to push. I think my heart stopped at this moment as I watched Gail reach for the clamps and scissors. Vanessa held her breath. She looked as if she would pass out. There was not a cry from the baby yet as his little head just remained still. After the cord was cut Gail told Vanessa to push! And wham……there I was catching this slippery beautiful baby boy and placing him on his gorgeous Momma’s chest as he let out the cry of life. I choked up as I saw my wife hold our new baby boy and I was elated to know that both of them were healthy, safe, and well.

I was also very proud to be the new father of Zee Michael Dickey, born Saturday August 6rh, 2005 at 11:54 AM and the lucky husband of Vanessa Conrad Dickey – No words can describe an experience of this magnitude.